i'm still lost

Slower slower. we don't have time for that. all i want is to find an easier way. to get out of our little heads

2006-02-23T02:33:00.000+08:00

bangkok rock fest.
i was there mainly for ian brown. monkey boy did only 2 paltry stone roses songs(waterfall and she bangs the drums, good though depite moshing half naked sweaty farangs). oasis were arrogant wankers(as usual).
Franz Ferdinand were okay. placebo were really good. as were maximo park and futureheads. the second day was the best performance as all the bands were in top form.
snow patrol were the best band of the whole festival.
they were outstanding. these two songs were the best in the whole gig in my opinion.
maybe cos i felt they mean something to me...
sigh, sometimes you wish you didn't have to make the decisions that you do.
but you know that in the long run, it's gonna be better this way for others.
going with the heart or mind, cold hard logic wins out.
going with your heart always gets you and others hurt.

always.

How to be dead - Snow Patrol

Please don't go crazy, if I tell you the truth
No you don't know what happened
And you never will if
You don't listen to me while I talk to the wall
This blanket is freezing, it's been out in the hall
Where you've had me for hours
Till I'm sure what I want
But darling I want the same thing that I wanted before
So sweetheart tell me what's up I won't stop no way

Please keep your hands down
And stop raising your voice
It's hardly what I'd be doing if you gave me a choice
It's a simple suggestion can you give me sometime
So just say yes or no
Why can't you shoulder the blame
Coz both my shoulders are heavy
From the weight of us both
You're a big boy now so let's not talk about growth
You've not heard a single word I have said...
Oh, my God

Please take it easy it can't all be my fault
I haven't made half the mistakes
That you've listed so far
Oh baby let me explain something
It's all down to drugs
At least I remember taking the and not a lot else
It seems I've stepped over lines
You've drawn again and again
But if the ecstacy's in the wit is definitely out
Dr. Jekyll is wrestling Hyde for my pride

Run - Snow Patrol

I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all I've done

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Away from here

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

To think I might not see those eyes
Makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbye
I nearly do

Light up...

Slower slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads

Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess

having said all that,
Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days/months/years?
Making up for all this mess

But out there the world is a beautiful place.

2006-02-08T02:10:00.000+08:00

Some people get up at the break of day
Gotta go to work before it gets too late
Sitting in a car and driving down the road
It ain't the way it has to be

But that's what you do to earn your daily wage
That's the kind of world that we live in today
Isn't where you wanna be
And isn't what you wanna be

Give me one more day (one more day)
Give me another night (just another night)
I need a second chance (second chance)
This time I'll get it right (This time I'll get it right)

I'll say one last time (one last time)
I've got to let you know (I've got to let you know)
I've got to change your mind (I've got to change your mind)
I'll never let you go (I'll never let you go)

You've got to look at life the way it oughta be
Looking at the stars from underneath the tree
There's a world inside and a world out there
With that tv you just don't care

They've got violence, wars and killing too
All shrunk down in a two-foot tube
But out there the world is a beautiful place
With mountains, lakes and the human race
This is where I wanna be
And this is what I wanna do

Give me one more day (one more day)
Give me another night (just another night)
I need a second chance (second chance)
This time I'll get it right (This time I'll get it right)

I'll say one last time (one last time)
I've got to let you know (I've got to let you know)
I've got to change your mind (I've got to change your mind)
I'll never let you go (I'll never let you go)

Just give me one more chance (one more chance)
Give me another night (just another night)
With just one more day (one more day)
You know I'll get it right (You know I'll get it right)

I'll say one last time (one last time)
I've got to let you know (I've got to let you know)
If I could change your mind (If I could change your mind)
I'll never let you go (I'll never let you go)

New Order
Krafty

< rant>
it takes so much to just go on
i know i'm not strong enough for other people
yet i still try.
and in the end i just end up screwing them and myself up.
a lot.
i'm so tempted to give up on myself.
it sucks to hurt so much.
it sucks that other people hurt so much.
yet sometimes...

But out there the world is a beautiful place
With mountains, lakes and the human race
This is where I wanna be
And this is what I wanna do

i'll keep trying.
i'm not gonna give up. on myself.
and when i'm stronger and not hurting so much, not on other people.
< / endrant>

the world is a beautiful place. a friendly smile from an innocent child, the knowingly bad joke from a friend, the sunlight filtering thru foilage, the genuine laughter from a group of teens caught up in their silly antics, a peck on the cheek exchanged between a couple freshly in love, a unexpected midnight call from a friend that you thought you had lost contact with.
we got to believe in it.
if we don't believe in all these, then there's nothing worth believing at all.

i choose the world that i wanna live in.
i choose how i wanna perceive it. i choose how i wanna believe in it.
it's my choice. and i choose not to think negatively about it.
if it still fucks up, at least i can say i have tried my best.

back to the bottle.

hit and run

2005-11-25T15:16:00.000+08:00

i was riding down sunset way near maju camp to meet Y for kopi near his place last night, when an accident occurred in front of me. 2 girls were lying on the road with their bike on it's side in the centre of the road. i pulled over to help them.

the pillon was lying on her side in pain while the biker was comforting her. with a few other people who pulled over, we helped them into a more comfortable position. i talked to the rider a bit and found out that it was a car that had bullied and cut into their lane, pushing the bike over and causing it to skid and crash. the fucker then sped away leaving the 2 girls bleeding and lying on the road. may that fucking driver burn in hell forever(yes, i am extremely angry over this).

still, it was heartening to see so many people stay to provide assistance. it could have been a damn good racial unity propaganda ad. a chinese man with his wife and toddler in tow, pulled over and called an ambulance and TP. a fellow malay biker who had pulled over, proceeded to direct traffic with me. an indian woman who was on a bus, got off, promptly informed us she was a nurse and helped the girls. a few cars, and quite a number of bikes pulled over and asked if there was anything they could do to help. maybe it's just me but you can always count on a fellow biker to help you out. reminded me of my first accident where there was a horde of bikers who pulled me to the side and help direct traffic away.

after the pillon rider was stretchered away, the paramedics tried to help the biker to the ambulance but she couldn't stand at all. that's when it struck me, in a bike accident, there's no way the biker and pillon can fly off in the same direction upon impact. the biker had dragged herself, bleeding, in obvious pain and all, over to the pillon rider to comfort her.

i hope those two girls get well soon.
and may the driver suffer for what he/she has done.

horribly.

and in extreme pain.

sorry.

2005-11-24T12:56:00.000+08:00

i'm sorry that i can't be there for a certain someone cos of how things are now.

i'm sorry that i yelled at C cos i really felt damn helpless and lost when i was on the phone with her. i must master my emotions.

i'm sorry about how the way things had turned out.

i used to be able to make tough snap decisions and accept the consequences good or bad. a sagi trait i believe. now, i'm mired in indecisiveness. sucks when whatever used to pass off as self confidence deserts you.

bah. this is becoming a fucking bloody whine blog.

fuck this shit. i will make a damn decision soon, listen to and confide in the people i trust more. an outsider's view of things is more insightful than what your heart tells you.

sometimes.

and i should open up more.

i must not fear

2005-11-16T14:01:00.000+08:00

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

Frank Herbert, Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear, "Dune"

i can keep rereading his works again and again and never tire of them.
maybe it's time to get the whole collected boxset. and no, the kevin j anderson continuation of the series is totally not canon. man that sounded really, really sci-fic geeky. grr i wish i ain't so broke now.

i must not fear. let the gom jabbar come.

a terrible beauty is born

2005-11-16T12:55:00.000+08:00

it's nice and quiet these past few days.
an uneasy peace reigns with this gut feeling that something is gonna go really bad.
like real soon.

i'll just enjoy whatever snatches of peace i can get for now.
in whatever form it manifests itself.
and ready myself for whatever comes.

requiem for a dream

2005-11-11T18:45:00.000+08:00

just got back today from bali.

it's where i wanna stay now. it's so beautiful there.
the diving was excellent, the food is good, the scenery is lovely, the people are nice, beer is cheap and good, the partying is okay( only r&b and trance) and you just get good vibes from the place.

the temples are really very pretty over there

tanah lot
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

will upload more on flickr when i'm free.
by the way, did i mention i saw mantas? yeap not singular. 10-12 of them. :)
it's so breathtaking when they glide slowly, majestically over you, just eclipse the sun and you're shrouded in darkness for
a few seconds.

when you see such majestic creatures, you can't help but feel so privileged that you share the same world with them.

it's so reassuring that such a paradise like bali exists in this world too. so, despite all the strife, hate, anger that's out there, that's also a little piece of heaven that's within our reach. just gotta look for it :)
i found some of mine in bali.

on behalf of the balinese people who are so nice and undaunted by all the recent events,
i have 2 words to say.

Fuck terrorists.

i'll definitely return to bali again.

soon i hope.

goodil

2005-11-05T15:49:00.000+08:00

i seriously wonder if this vacation i'm taking is just another form of escape.
the die is cast. even if it is, i still gotta go for it.
last night was awesome. despite all the premonitions, bad dreams and how afraid i was, i went.
and the thing is, after a bit of initial insecurity, i really didn't give a fuck about all that anymore.
what i feared didn't happened, but i suppose since it took a lot out of me to be down there, i really didn't give a flying fuck!
:)
i have my own life to live. and my own things to do. as does everyone else.

i had a great time despite how crowded it was.
it seems i'm getting somewhere with the letting go yeah?

i've always mused about this. blessing or curse, blessing or curse.
Y, if he reads this, knows what i'm talking about.
i'll settle for bittersweet blessing. :)
what's the point in being so sad, angry and bitter about things all the time?
gets ya nowhere.
savour the sweet good memories and never forget the bitter lessons learnt.

lost a lot but gaining in so much more.
perhaps it's more like refinement.
you throw the ore into the fire, you'll hit the impurities out on the anvil.
leaving only the valuable metal.

heh. whatever. i'm rambling on my last last post before bali.
hell if local bar boy can have last last gigs, i can have last last posts.
just kidding.

maybe this bali trip would be like the calm before the monsoon storm.
the week before the monsoon arrives, the sea is usually so calm it's like a swimming pool.
the monsoon hasn't arrived yet. talked to a dive operator a few days back and he's still running trips to msia.
the calm before the great damn mother of all tempest comes.

we'll see.

on a trip to bali.

one dance left.

same hard game of blues

2005-11-04T16:43:00.000+08:00

i pray i'll be strong tonight.

this'll be my last post before bali.
a week of sun,sand,surf,diving,temples,bintang beer.
sun splashed goodness.

who says some things can never turn out right?

just want my happiness to stay.

and some of it does stay. in the form of people who stand by you and give you strength when you falter. in the form of smses and calls in wierd hours from people who just call to tell you that they miss you and love you lots. in the form of a heartfelt hug and a squeeze of your hand to reassure you that you're never alone.

i love all of you.

to Bali! maybe i'll get lucky and catch some indo bands there.
toodles~.

there's gotta be more to life than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me

2005-11-04T11:48:00.000+08:00

yeah yeah it's a stacie orrico pop song.

"Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers..... Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind numbing, spirit crushing game shows, stuffing junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life..... But why would I want to do a thing like that?"

Renton - Trainspotting

it's depressing when you rely on temporary highs to be happy.
hmm contradictory statement.
was supposed to detox before bali yet i've ended up drinking way too much this week.
is it better to have never known true happiness and just get by?
or to have gotten a glimpse of it and then attempt to pursue it?

someone once mentioned i'll be happier leading this kinda of hard drinking, partying life.
maybe, i could have pulled it off before. but not now.

drinking just doesn't do much for me these days.
unfortunately it's the most common activity that occurs at night with people and i'll jump at any opportunity to get out of the house. i don't wanna rot at home and think too much.

heck, can't wait for bali. and that ain't some temporary high.
it's a place i've always wanted to go and details are more or less settled.
just some last minute nitty gritty stuff that i'll deal with before i leave.

now excuse me while i go nap off this jurong island sized hangover.

2005-11-02T13:23:00.000+08:00

To absent friends, lost loves, old gods, and the season of mists; and may each and every one of us always give the devil his due.

on a trip to bali!

2005-10-28T18:40:00.000+08:00

it's confirmed! i'm off to the isle of gods!

please please please let me get what i want

2005-10-28T10:00:00.000+08:00

i talk with a raspy whisper right now but i'm really glad last night's karaoke session happened. and company(just two other boys) was just right even though we were on mike duty almost non stop for 4 hours. i never was good with big groups. doing 'hard to say i'm sorry' by chicago ala bon jovi totally cracked me up. it's the first time i've done so many chinese songs in one sitting. ah well, they're the most emo songs one can find in karaoke anyway. it felt damn good belting them out and getting things out of my system.

surprise surprise, D called me while i was mangling a song and told me bali was on!
i'm crossing my fingers now and hoping tickets and other details can be settled asap as today's the last day for the offer. please don't let my hopes be dashed at the last minute.

well even if they do get dashed, there's always another time. ;)

one dance left!

cast into a sea of doubt

2005-10-27T17:11:00.000+08:00

SIA is offering a flight for two to Bali for just $378sgd.

noone to go with. those i've approached are broke, waiting for a toto windfall, standing by their principles or afraid of a 3rd bombing.

damnit.

no point going to the isle of the gods if you go alone and there's noone to partake it's beauty with.

i shall cross my fingers and hope the aceh trip happens.

observatory was good last night at the university cultural centre.
they opened with 'sea of doubt' followed by 'this sad song'. and i love both of these songs. it's been a long long time since i've been to a gig of theirs and i finally got to hear some of their blank walls songs. i wished i had gone for their album launch gig. the one with vivian on vocals(didn't catch title) was lovely. dischordantly sounding in some parts in sync with the mood of the lyrics.
how apt.

*shrug*
you only get what you give.

wu si kee, wu si low.

2005-10-26T13:00:00.000+08:00

the moments when you're filled with hope for your dreams before they're broken are sometimes the sweetest moments.
even sweeter than dreams that come true.

ah well.
acknowledge, shrug, stand up, dust the dirt from my pants and walk on.
but never forget or there's never anything learnt.

nothing ever happens without a purpose.
you just gotta look hard for it sometimes. ;)

and sometimes, just sometimes, overdosing on ice cream and waffles with friends is all you need to feel a lil better. :)
met up with D after she appeared again after 5 and a half weeks.
i'm glad i have people around me who don't bother patronising me but are willing to just tell me the facts as they are and advise what i should do.
which is what this silly boy needs. not comforting but what i should do to wake up.
cos until recently he's been too caught up with himself and blind to ever see what's wrong.

emotions still move like the ebb and flow of the tide.
hmm isn't that from a hokkien song?
and sometimes it still hurts like nothing that should ever be conceived in this world.
isn't it comforting, wallowing in escapist self indulgent self pitying thoughts? hah!
bah,like it'll be productive and get me somewhere.
still, i won't want to go back to where/what i was.
before i can walk on, i gotta master my emotions. you get what you give.
fuck this shite.

and smile like you mean it
:)

one dance left

rain rain go away

2005-10-24T11:56:00.000+08:00

the monsoon season is almost upon us.
seems to have started for me though.
my mood swings are starting to mirror the weather.
from extreme sunny dispositons where i believe i can right all the wrongs i have done to downright dark stormy downpours where i drown.
i've always been easily affected by my emotional enviroment and the flash floods just keep coming and coming...

at least it's who i really am. no more shelving away if i want to be me.
JH came back from his mission trip 2 days ago and we had a kopi session last night.
it was good to talk to him. he made me realise that i need an anchor. and it's something i've always known the answer to but just kept avoiding all these years.

it felt good to talk to him again and i had my first real night of peaceful sleep in ages after that. i've always questioned why we have to face so many trials and tribulations in this life. JH just answered me simply that it's cos he chastises the ones he really loves. if he didn't love us, why bother? a simple answer to a question that i've always been asking myself and imagined unanswerable all these years.

i've still got a long way to go in this journey. and i daresay the forecast is more showers and stormy weather ahead(after all the monsoon is coming). it's a choice of facing the tempest with a downtrodden defeated look on your face, hating every moment cos you're getting wet or going out there weathering it with a grin, enjoying the raindrops on your face and whistling 'singing in the rain'. like hell if i'm going to throw the towel, umbrella, galoshes, raincoat and the kitchen sink in.

one dance left.

you get what you give

2005-10-21T10:42:00.000+08:00

re

Wake up kids
We've got the dreamers disease
Age 14 we got you down on your knees
So polite, you're busy still saying please
Frienemies, who when you're down ain't your friend
Every night we smash their Mercedes-Benz
First we run; and then we laugh till we cry
But when the night is falling
and you cannot find the light,light
If you feel your dreams are dying
Hold tight

You've got the music in you
Don't let go
You've got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don't give up
You've got a reason to live
Can't forget
you only get what you give

Four a.m. we ran a miracle mile
we're flat broke but hey we do it in style
The bad rich
God's flying in for your trial
But when the night is falling
and you cannot find a friend, friend
You feel your tree is breaking
Just then

You've got the music in you
Don't let go
You've got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don't give up
You've got a reason to live
Can't forget
you only get what you give

This whole damn world can fall apart
You'll be ok, follow your heart
You're in harms way I'm right behind
Now say you're mine

You've got the music in you
Don't let go
You've got the music in you
One dance left
This world is gonna pull through
Don't give up
You've got a reason to live
Can't forget
you only get what we give
Don't let go
We feel the music in you
Don't let go

Fly high
What's real can't die
You only get what you give
You're gonna get what you give
Just don't be afraid to leave

Health insurance rip off lying FDA big bankers buying
Fake computer crashes dining
Cloning while they're multiplying
Fashion shoots with Beck and Hanson
Courtney Love, and Marilyn Manson
You're all fakes
Run to your mansions
Come around
We'll kick your ass in!
Don't let go
One dance left

New Radicals - you get what you give

i've fallen really low this time.
i've lost so much. friends, myself and a love.
i abused the love and trust given to me.

hell, i'm not going to run away anymore.
i'm going to fight for everything worth fighting for.
it's time i made a stand within myself.
it's time i've woken up and learn to really trust again.
it's time i learnt how to change for the better instead of being bitter and thinking it's other people and never me.
i'm not gonna believe in fate.
and even if i lose, i'm going to make sure it'll be after i've given my all.

and find the courage and wisdom to accept it, pick up the pieces and move on.

this silly boy has one dance left.
and he's gonna milk it for all it's worth.
a big thank you to family, all past and present friends.
for all you've done to make me realise i was never ever ever really alone.

one dance left.

2005-09-12T16:10:00.000+08:00

goodbye and goodnight.

trust

2005-08-26T23:01:00.000+08:00

it's been ages since i've went on a ride at night alone.
it really is therapeutic when you just forget about whatever's on your mind for the moment(way cheaper than drinking yourself into a stupor), concentrating on the road ahead of you while slave driving your bike to it's maximum speed and feeling the wind on your face.

i'm going on 2 weeks reservist training while most of my friends are holidaying overseas(bah humbug) so this blog will be on hiatus for a while.

The Cure is one of those good bands that manages to have songs that cover both extreme ends of the emotional spectrum. here's one of their most negatively depressing songs ever.

There is no-one left in the world
That I can hold onto
There is really no-one left at all
There is only you
And if you leave me now
You leave all that we were
Undone
There is really no-one left
You are the only one

And still the hardest part for you
To put your trust in me
I love you more than I can say
Why won't you just believe?

The Cure
Trust

staralfur

2005-08-23T06:29:00.000+08:00

Starir á mig lítill álfur
Hleypur að mér en hreyfist ekki
Ur stað - sjalfur
Starálfur

Sigur Ros
Staralfur

who says you gotta understand what they're singing about to comprehend the beauty of the song? i don't have a phd in pidgin icelandic but i still love this sigur ros song to bits.

Aha this kiss you give, it’s never ever gonna fade away

2005-08-12T12:15:00.000+08:00

"A bright light filled the plane," wrote Col. Paul Tibbets, the pilot of the Enola Gay, the B-29 that dropped the first atomic bomb. "We turned back to look at Hiroshima. The city was hidden by that awful cloud...boiling up, mushrooming." For a moment, no one spoke. Then everyone was talking. "Look at that! Look at that! Look at that!" exclaimed the co-pilot, Robert Lewis, pounding on Tibbets's shoulder. Lewis said he could taste atomic fission; it tasted like lead. Then he turned away to write in his journal. "My God," he asked himself, "what have we done?" (special report, "Hiroshima: August 6, 1945")

Newsweek July 24th 1995

the 60th anniversary of the Hiroshima bombing was comemorated recently. it's scary that despite such a cruel example in 1945, more nations are trying to get involved in the nuclear arms race.

i'll leave you with the happy tune and poignant lyrics from OMD's Enola Gay.
this used to be my mobile ringtone and i still love the cheesy keyboards in it.
Astreal,Muon and Force Vormit will be playing today at Rouge 11pm onwards.
so be nice Ompah Loompahs and head down to catch them. see you there.

Enola gay, you should have stayed at home yesterday
Aha words can’t describe the feeling and the way you lied

These games you play, they’re gonna end it more than tears someday
Aha enola gay, it shouldn’t ever have to end this way

It’s 8:15, and that’s the time that it’s always been
We got your message on the radio, conditions normal and you’re coming home

Enola gay, is mother proud of little boy today
Aha this kiss you give, it’s never ever gonna fade away

Enola gay, it shouldn’t ever have to end this way
Aha enola gay, it shouldn’t fade in our dreams away

It’s 8:15, and that’s the time that it’s always been
We got your message on the radio, conditions normal and you’re coming home

Enola gay, is mother proud of little boy today
Aha this kiss you give, it’s never ever gonna fade away

Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark
Enola Gay

simple pleasures

2005-08-10T21:11:00.000+08:00

a simple walk made my national day. chester's really lovable. he's huge!
though it was the first time i got called uncle by a &$#*ing lil brat.
i was looking behind and thinking maybe there was some uncle behind me.
turns out the kid was referring to me and wanted me to get his balloon for him cos he was afraid to step on grass barefooted.
even my cousin's kids don't call me uncle!

and it seems i can't get away with parking my bike at my lot without season parking.
officers from Permas came at 2.30am to issue summons in plainclothes! 2.30am!
in plainclothes!
what happened to slacker manciks that come in scarves, big sunglasses,umbrellas and only issue summons once every 3 mths?!?! sigh... the evils of privatisation. i've gotten 2 tickets so far. :(

backstroke of the west

2005-08-04T19:03:00.000+08:00

may the force be with you?

this is damn hilarious. the subtitles are a direct english translation of the chinese interpretation of what the script was saying.
clicky clicky!
backstroke of the west

robert smith just won't shut up in my head

2005-08-01T12:04:00.000+08:00

The sun is up
I'm so happy I could scream!
And there's nowhere else in the world I'd rather be
Than here with you
It's perfect
It's all I ever wanted
I almost can't believe that it's for real

I really don't think it gets any better than this
Vanilla smile
And a gorgeous strawberry kiss!
Birds sing we swing
Clouds drift by and everything is like a dream
It's everything I wished

Never guessed it got this good
Wondered if it ever would
Really didn't think it could
Do it again?
I know we should!!!

The sun is up
I'm so fizzy I could burst!
You wet through and me headfirst
Into this is perfect
It's all I ever wanted
Ow! it feels so big it almost hurts!

Never guessed it got this good
Wondered if it ever would
Really didn't think it could
Do it some more?
I know we should!!!

Say it will always be like this
The two of us together
It will always be like this
Forever and ever and ever...

Never guessed it got this good
Wondered if it ever would
Really didn't think it could
Do it all the time?
I know that we should!

The Cure
'Mint Car'

:)

i wish this dream comes true

2005-07-30T02:14:00.000+08:00

Ooh I don't know what to do
About this dream and you
I wish this dream comes true

Digital Love
Dalf Punk

sights and sounds calling from far away

2005-07-27T14:18:00.000+08:00

P7160066
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

sweet lyrics
sweet earwax

Sing softly to me
Kings of Convenience

Things seem so much better when
They're not part of your close surroundings
Like words in a letter sent
Amplified by the distance
Possibilities and sweeter dreams
Sights and sounds calling from far away
Calling from far away

I didn't know you then, now did I girl?
I couldn't hear you singing softly to me
I didn't know you then, now did I girl?
I didn't see the brave girl so near me
I didn't know you then, now did I girl?
I couldn't hear you sing softly to me

I wanted a mystery that couldn't be solved
I wanted a puzzle with pieces missing
I wanted a story that couldn't be told
Only the fishing part of fishing

I didn't know you then, now did I girl?
I couldn't hear you singing softly to me
I didn't know you then, now did I girl?
I didn't see the brave girl so near me
I didn't know you then, now did I girl?
I couldn't hear you sing softly to me

And now I find
It was you all the time.
I'm in love again-
It's too late now...

too many tears all over this town

2005-07-26T03:22:00.000+08:00

going thru my mp3s and this suited the early rainy morning.

Tears all over town
A girl called Eddy

Ride the subway home
Pretend that you're not home
When somebody calls you
But nobody calls you

And it's me who loves you still
And I always will

But there are tears all over town
Too many tears all over this town
There are tears all over town
Too many tears

Once there were trumpets in the air
And confetti in your hair
And I knew where I belonged
Now I'm singing you this song

And every star we held that night
We reached for it all you know we tried

But there are tears all over town
Too many tears all over this town
There are tears all over town
Too many tears

I'm scattered like newspapers all over the street
I see your face in everyone I meet
I'm avoiding the corners
I'm avoiding your name
I know that I loved you but I loved you in vain

And this city's too small for two
My melancholy friend and you

And these tears all over town
Too many tears all over this town
Tears all over town
Too many tears all over this town
Too many tears
Too many tears...

my view when i smoke in my room

2005-07-19T02:25:00.000+08:00

in the quiet of the night
sometimes, just sometimes.
everything feels alright.

rain rain, go away. bring back the sun

2005-07-18T13:27:00.000+08:00

concave scream
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

this was actually taken early this year when music for good organised a tsunami gig.

i didn't bring a camera down to baybeats this year. doubt i would have snapped photos for concave scream anyway. i was too entranced by their sound.

i didn't really bother with the arena bands this year maybe cos a certain electric co groupie person ain't around to drag me in. you know who you are. sharon and i were lamenting about your absence. :P and i'm really not interested in some emo indieband from michigan, portland, texas blah blah.

i would rather we have more good bands from asia. i have heard good bands from malaysia, thailand and singapore. perhaps i should use this analogy. you're a hungry man. you've only got 5 dollars. it can get you a plate of chicken rice with kailan and the works or it can get you a fancy looking but ultimately unfilling croissant. there is a time and place for croissants. but maybe you shouldn't give a hungry man a croissant when what he needs is a plate of chicken rice? perhaps we should awaken up to that?

and there's nothing i can do

2005-07-13T18:07:00.000+08:00

David Bowie
Ground Control to Major Tom

Ground control to major tom
Ground control to major tom
Take your protein pills and put your helmet on

Ground control to major tom
Commencing countdown, engines on
Check ignition and may god’s love be with you

Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five,
Four, three, two, one, liftoff

This is ground control to major tom
You’ve really made the grade
And the papers want to know whose shirts you wear
Now it’s time to leave the capsule if you dare

This is major tom to ground control
I’m stepping through the door
And I’m floating in a most peculiar way
And the stars look very different today

For here
Am I sitting in a tin can
Far above the world
Planet earth is blue
And there’s nothing I can do

Though I’m past one hundred thousand miles
I’m feeling very still
And I think my spaceship knows which way to go
Tell me wife I love her very much she knows

Ground control to major tom
Your circuit’s dead, there’s something wrong
Can you hear me, major tom?
Can you hear me, major tom?
Can you hear me, major tom?
Can you....

Here am I floating round my tin can
Far above the moon
Planet earth is blue
And there’s nothing I can do.

2005-07-12T21:48:00.000+08:00

swallowing blackness
should eyes be closed or open?
in the dark with you?

And I was touched by the hand of god. never knew it but of course i was

2005-07-07T03:27:00.000+08:00

got this off ginette's blog.

loved the whole-heartedly disappointed with you part!
well god, sometimes i'm disappointed with myself too. it's ok. :P

went for day sugery today at nuh today to remove the titanium implant in my right hand.
now hand looks like a swollen trotter.

so i am as of today no longer the one sixteenth metal alchemist. yeah yeah, crappy anime joke. :P

this is the implant they got out. i don't need to worry about tripping off metal detectors at airports no more now. 14 days mc! wee!

why do birds suddenly appear?

2005-07-06T12:03:00.000+08:00

sam's photos and blog entry from monday's neil gaiman's talk, sound of her wings here.
she had her death plushie autographed by neil in a *ahem* rather interesting way.

random thought. i wonder how many blogs talking about neil's visit would pop up if i were to google for 'neil gaiman singapore'?

i met my literary hero today

2005-07-05T02:20:00.000+08:00

i was exposed to sandman when i used to chill at my friend's place as a teen and i would read his brother's sandman collection without the brother's permission(thanks noel! :P).it opened me up to the world of graphic novels. i had never experienced such good storytelling in comics before and soon, i was saving up to get my own copy on my allowance.

through gaiman, i moved on to alan moore and other writers and the next thing i know, i have a hobby that burns a hole in my wallet.

i am still blown away by the depth of all his works. because of him, i got really interested in mythology and all the different patheons of gods in each culture. american gods shows how much research he has done into each of them.

enough fanboy talk. here's some pictures of neil.

mr neil gaiman in his trademark leather jacket.

close up

his autograph on my yellowing 10 year old copy of preludes and nocturnes.

what he signed for candice. so i suppose i can dream but candice can only dream a little :P

i hope i can make it on wednesday evening at borders and catch him again.

new wave has gone the way of the bossa nova

2005-07-01T23:48:00.000+08:00

nouvelle vague did something that i could never believe. crossbreeding new wave with bossa nova. before you purists start screaming sacrilege, go cop a hear. video here

teenage kicks from our cocktails and beaches eh? enjoy.

in some cities theres too much history coming down

2005-06-24T17:43:00.000+08:00

after listening to samples of the doves' new album, some cities here, i got moved to buy the album. snowden is stuck on repeat mode now. thanks to don for the heads up.

health tip of the day

2005-06-24T09:32:00.000+08:00

i love stupid office emails.

Subject : Health Benefits of Smoking

After fifteen years : your risk of heart attack and stroke is almost the same as that of a person who has never smoked

Make use of these tips both in the office as well as with your family and stay HEALTHY. Supervisors, please share this with your staff without email

The last 4 weeks we have been foucssing on smoking. The Health tips for the next 2 weeks will be focussing on eating fruits and vegetables.

Regards

XXXX XXXXXX
Manager-Security, Health and Safety
Human Resources

so i should smoke for 15 years, stop and will be in the same physical peak condition as a non smoker? alright! i get to smoke for 6 more years before i have to quit! i shit you not. this is the mail i got.

moral of this post: ALWAYS vet your emails(running a spellcheck would be good too) before sending them out especially if it's to many recipients(eg: an entire organization). and stay HEALTHY!

batman begins rocks, radzi spins 9 at hideout and a real full blown poptart session happens at home tommorow. all this and other news at nine.

mononoke hime, gaiman and swordfish musings

2005-06-20T13:28:00.000+08:00

i have princess mononoke's theme by joe hisaishi stuck in my head.
it's a really lovely track.

papers had a quote by hayo miyazaki recently saying that he doesn't watch tv,keep track of recent happenings or something like that. maybe that's why his stories are timeless and in a way, unbiased/tinged by whatever's wrong happening in the world these days.

another thing. neil gaiman's in town. i haven't gotten my name down for any of the events or bought the tickets yet. phooey.
soon.

there's a inane craving for swordfish sashimi.
it must have been ages since i've had raw fish.
i've been promising myself to go for a dive soon for ages
and yet i'm still on dry land. sigh. yakkul should be out on the road by wednesday. i've been deprived of my heathier indulgences for too long and doing way too much drinking.
perhaps it's time to sit back minus alcohol and comtemplate things a lil.

logic will break your heart

2005-06-13T21:57:00.000+08:00

the stills
gender bombs
Brains, on a brick wall, from gender bombs would fall
The sordid way allotted phrases infiltrate your skull

Images are strong, impulses are strong
And logic will break your heart forever, be brave

Massive suicide dreams
The feel warm and long

The girl will school you
The girl will...

And could this be the gaining force of ten loves in a row
The drunken Sunday evening's would just be in your way, no

Massive Suicide dreams
The feel warm and long

The girl will school you...

you can listen to it here.

the fool

2005-06-09T01:31:00.000+08:00

sorta expected to be this before i did the test.

You are the Fool card. The Fool fearlessly begins
the journey into the unknown. To do this, he
does not regard the world he knows as firm and
fixed. He has a seemingly reckless disregard
for obstacles. In the Ryder-Waite deck, he is
seen stepping off a cliff with his gaze on the
sky, and a rainbow is there to catch him. In
order to explore and expand, one must disregard
convention and conformity. Those in the throes
of convention look at the unconventional,
non-conformist personality and think What a
fool. They lack the point of view to understand
The Fool's actions. But The Fool has roots in
tradition as one who is closest to the spirit
world. In many tribal cultures, those born with
strange and unusual character traits were held
in awe. Shamans were people who could see
visions and go on journeys that we now label
hallucinations and schizophrenia. Those with
physical differences had experience and
knowledge that the average person could not
understand. The Fool is God. The number of the
card is zero, which when drawn is a perfect
circle. This circle represents both emptiness
and infinity. The Fool is not shackled by
mountains and valleys or by his physical body.
He does not accept the appearance of cliff and
air as being distinct or real. Image from: Mary
DeLave http://www.marydelave.com/

Which Tarot Card Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

by the way,
the power of christ compels you!
and i thought action figure jesus and buddy jesus were the coolest christian things around.

god help us all.
humanity is so fucked.

rock never dies

2005-06-07T14:21:00.000+08:00

took this a long time back. was going through old pictures and i smiled when i saw this. this was in no black tie in kl 1st Sept 03 with moods playing. this is the way music should be enjoyed.

the front crowd was having loads of fun and moshing while seated down. it was lepak moshing. one of those moments i doubt i'll forget. gotta love the kl kids. so full of vibrance and fun.

The Siths - featuring Darth Morrissey

2005-06-06T13:05:00.000+08:00

despite being quite busy these days with unexpected events in life, maintaining my DPI(drinking performance index) and other reponsibilities(exams, projects, work) screaming for me to get to them, i bring you comedy. will try to update blog with other stuff again when i can get my grubby paws on some free time. so many thoughts and ideas, so little time. and am supposed to have some links and banners up. soonish...

found this link on tessa's blog.
the siths. i had a chuckle over it.

there is a light saber that never goes out...

P

i was buying some feelings from a vending machine

2005-06-01T11:47:00.000+08:00

i know the image is supposed to be from 'life's an ocean'. a really great song too but what's playing in my head now is 'on your own'
it's one of the first few songs i learnt how to play on guitar.
yeah yeah, i'm one of those who's first secular song they learnt on guitar was 'more than words'.

Verve
On your own

Tell me what you see
Was it a dream? Was I in it?
Life seemed so obscene until it's over
Who knows?

All I want is someone who can fill the hole
In the life I know
In between life and death when there's nothing left
Do you wanna know?

You come in on your own
And you leave on your own
Forget the lovers you've know
And your friends on your own

Tell me if it's true
That I need you, you are changing
I've seen this road before down on the floor
It is hurting me

All I want is someone who can fill the hole in the life I know
In between life and death when there's nothing left
Do you want to know?

You come in on your own
And you leave on your own
Forget the lovers you've know
And your friends on your own

Lies I've got to get rid of this whole inside
i'm coming in on my own
i'm coming in on my own

mad world

2005-06-01T11:27:00.000+08:00

you really would feel that the world is screwed up when you turn on the news in the morning. footages of riots, dictators, violence, war, suicide bombers feature prominently and you just happen to have gary jule's mad world playing in the background.

it's a really really mad world

sigh.

Local Barboy

2005-05-31T10:16:00.000+08:00

a local band doing covers of local bands.
Joe,Tim and a couple more friends are basically going to provide the music and backing vocals to allow us to karaoke to.
the hoegaarden is cheap and cold at POW.
nuff said.

last night was an unexpected crazy night at the last bar none session. caught a lil of dreams of day architecture and serenaide. serenaide brought the house down. the encore(girl from katong) had almost everyone jumping on their feet and singing along with remy. i always like their performances. so fun. it's so poppy and feel good, you can't help but bop to them. too bad about the high handed over enthusiatic bouncer though. cmon lah dey! pop culture is the new gahmen rice bowl(or shall i use that horrible word, hub? sg damn slutty, wants to be the hub of everything these days.)! we're trying to support the gahmen by partying hard. so don't stop me from loving my PAP.

the party after was a gathering of popsluts.
i actually managed to dance off the copious amounts of alcohol downed.
there was no chance to rest as favourite after favourite just kept coming.
if i keep this up every night, i'll be able to loose some flab.
it's like as pearl said. poptart condensed into 2 hours.

see you wednesday.

In starlit nights I saw you, so cruelly you kissed me, your lips a magic world, your sky all hung with jewels

2005-05-30T12:43:00.000+08:00

i wanna watch donnie darko again soon.
hopefully i can get my grubby paws on the director's cut soon.

Echo and the Bunnymen's Killing Moon is the theme for the movie in my humble opinion. the opening scene of donnie cycling back home with the song playing always kills me. gary jule's mad world is a close second.

the killing time
unwillingly mine...

Under blue moon I saw you
So soon you'll take me
Up in your arms, too late to beg you
Or cancel it, though I know it must be
The killing time
Unwillingly mine

Fate
Up against your will
Through the thick and thin
He will wait until
You give yourself to him

In starlit nights I saw you
So cruelly you kissed me
Your lips a magic world
Your sky all hung with jewels
The killing moon
Will come too soon

Fate
Up against your will
Through the thick and thin
He will wait until
You give yourself to him

Under blue moon I saw you
So soon you'll take me
Up in your arms, too late to beg you
or cancel it though I know it must be
The killing time
Unwillingly mine

Fate
Up against your will
Through the thick and thin
He will wait until
You give yourself to him

Fate
Up against your will
Through the thick and thin
He will wait until
You give yourself to him
You give yourself to him

La la la la la...

deep blue

2005-05-25T23:36:00.000+08:00

lovely trailer.
along the same lines of blue planet.
can't wait. :D

they shouldn't use the poster of the hammerheads though. it is an awe inspiring sight that i doubt i'll ever have a chance to see in real life but it'll give those stupid people the idea that the ocean is still abundant with sharks and we should continue eating shark's fin soup at chinese wedding dinners.

every bowl served to you means one lesser of those magnificent creatures below the surface and you're depriving latter generations the chance to see a real live one.

by the way, the high mercury content in it is what's making those fins so yummy.
enjoy.

V for Vendetta

2005-05-17T23:21:00.000+08:00

good evening london, it's eleven o'clock and this is the Voice of Fate.

read in papers about the star wars premiere and Natalie Portman was bald in the photos.
the explanation was that she shaved it off for her latest work, V for vendetta.

that can only mean one thing! she's Evey Hammond in the movie! going to imdb, i dug up more juicy nuggets. Hugo Weaving as V! i think he's a good choice. i hope the Whachowski brothers don't screw it up. the last few Alan Moore books to flicks were erm...shall we say a let down to his works?

England Prevails.

why dya sing Hallelujah when it means nothing to you?

2005-05-16T12:00:00.000+08:00

surrounded the incessant horning of long snaking traffic on the expressway on a wet monday morning, i buried myself in the sounds of chet baker, kings of convienience and damien rice.

detaching myself from the seething urban tangle of man and steel,i dreamt of lazy sunny mornings spent lying on backs in rustling green fields with muted sunshine warming faces and the gentle pounding of the dawdling surf from the nearby beach filling ears under an impossibly blue sky.

i dreamt of close friends sprawled about, partaking in good wine, engaging conversation and merriment. frittered with weak attempts at coyness by covering one's mouth with the back of one's hand while laughter flows unchecked and joyous.

i dreamt of lovers entwined, her nestled in the crook of his arm, reading aloud and sharing her favourite lines from the book she's reading with him while he gazes at her soft lips and takes pleasure from seeing their fluttering movements shape words.

i pressed the bell and alighted.
i rejoined the tangled ugly masses of man, concrete, machines and left my daydreams behind.

NANACA CRASH!

2005-05-13T00:05:00.000+08:00

latest flashgame addiction. click picture for link.
only the japs can make a game about a girl crashing a bike into a yaoi boy and seeing how far one can make him fly such a fun game.

and the irony of the situation is that i crashed my bike today.
a bloody malaysian biker with no qualms about losing his life cut in front of me into my lane at a turning this wet rainy morning. startled, i jammed my brakes.
well it was either that or me ramming into the bastard. i lost control and crashed due to the wet surface. sigh

the usual cuts and bruises. yakkul's not doing too well though.
the bike doc says it's bad. ah well. so it is a good thing i didn't go up KL this weekend. seems this is what the spare cash lying about is for. yakkul's medical fee.
*groan*

anyways

this is my high score. let's see you guys break it.

scared, scarred more than a couple of times

2005-05-10T12:40:00.000+08:00

but you're my beautiful blistering blind find.

i felt bad turning down joe's offer to join him in heading up to KL.
i wanna get some twilight action girl action and catch up with KL friends.
and i really need a break soon. unfortunately fund deficiency got in the way and i got to work on my graduation project. ah well, i shall endure. just need to last a month or 2 more.

hopefully a decent dive trip mid year and UK year end(the bravery plays 2 days before my bday!).
bar none monday sessions are back. caught the last two songs by force vormit and they're always a joy to watch/dance/sing(Don't give up! Oh Siti don't give up!) along to. the after gig party with melvin on the decks was great due to great tunes(mew!), unabashed singing and wierd boogling. the great singapore workout should never ever be attempted to the music of Pulp. oh, drunken pals collapsing all over the place, using friends as air guitars and drunken tackle/strangle hugs also helped put everyone in the mood.

go check out the bar none sessions yeah? next week it's i am david sparkle, death of cinema and Phorous playing.

my mind and heart needs a break really soon. gah.

bliss! arcade fire!

2005-05-08T22:42:00.000+08:00

fabchannel has a live webcast of arcade fire on 11-05-05 at the paradiso! we can also get arcade fire live,adrian! :P

check out their archives. loads of stuff
kcrw for loads of stuff too. decemberists! and beck with the flaming lips! beck's rendition of 'do you realise?'
lovely!

kexp too!
kings of convienience! the kills! stars!

now enjoy. and while away hours in front of you computer in bliss.

spread the love!
P

metal gear solid code names

2005-05-06T07:36:00.000+08:00

remember metal gear solid?
interesting link here generates your code name for you mgs style.

you may refer to me as dagger puffin or affable ocelot. dammnit it ain't cool enough. kelvar llama would be cooler.

look at the stars, see how they shine for you.

2005-05-01T07:04:00.000+08:00

one of the things that cheer me up and keep me going is finding joy in little things.

after sending nat back to her hostel, i was traveling back home on the expressway when there was an ascent in highway. given that i was going quite fast,i noticed that the streetlights formed a pretty arc of twinkling lights moving past me set against a backdrop of a pinkish yellow dawn. i was enthralled by this sight, seemingly a long endless stretch of orion's belt. i kept one eye on the road of course, to make sure there are no vehicles in front of me.

i missed my exit out on the expressway.

2005-04-29T10:27:00.000+08:00

lepak 2

2005-04-29T10:26:00.000+08:00

lepak

2005-04-29T10:23:00.000+08:00

death from above to some tasty morsel below.

wahahahah i'm a j-rock loving galaxy angel!

2005-04-20T11:22:00.000+08:00

got this offadrian's blog. and shit, i know my anime a lil too well. i need to go on a cd shopping spree soon. there's nothing like tearing off the cellopane wrapping off a brand new cd that you really wanna listen to, and checking out the artwork and lyrics while listening to it. and no, i haven't listened to j-rock in ages though i still like l'arc en ciel.

Dance the night away by karchan85
Name
What you Look like
The Music	J-Rock

Quiz created with MemeGen!

i find it kind of funny. i find it kind of sad.

2005-04-20T10:51:00.000+08:00

Mad World

Gary Jules
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places
Worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going no where
Going no where
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression
No expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrow
No tomorrow
No tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday
Happy birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen
Sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me
No one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what’s my lesson
Look right through me
Look right through me
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles it's a very very
Mad world
Mad world
Enlarging your world
Mad world

Is anyone going anywhere? Everyone's got to be, somewhere

2005-04-19T15:39:00.000+08:00

Stereophonics

Traffic

We all face the same way, Still it takes all day
I take a look to my left, Pick out the worst and the best
She paints her lip, greasy and thick
Another mirror stare
And she's going where?

Another office affair, to kill an unborn scare
You talk dirty to a priest, it makes you human at least
Is she running away, to start a brand new day?
Or she's going home, why's she driving alone?

Is anyone going anywhere?
Everyone's got to be, somewhere

She's got a body in the boot, just bags of food
Those are models legs, but are they women's, are they men's?
She shouts down the phone, she missed a payment on the loan
She's go to be above the rest, keeping up with the best

Is anyone going anywhere?
Everyone's got to be, somewhere

She waits tables for a crook, you wrote a hardback book
You teach kids how to read, sell your body on the street
And that's without a job, another up town snob
But have I got you all wrong, one look and you were gone

Is anyone going anywhere?
Is anyone going anywhere?
Is anyone going anywhere?
Everyone's got to be, somewhere

of travis and coldplay

2005-04-18T13:01:00.000+08:00

Why does it always rain on me?
Is it because I lied when I was seventeen?

this horribly spotty weather spell better stop soon.
if it carries on, i'm gonna ask for a rebate/refund on my bike road tax.

on a cheerier note,jon is in the uk right now courtesy of mtv watching coldplay. jealousy is not a strong enough word to express how i feel now.

oh. and i have a mullet for hair now. i have to use a substantial amount of clay to make it seem otherwise. i believe my hairstylist must have been watching wham mtvs the night before he got his hands on my follicles.

men on mars. april showers!

2005-04-16T16:04:00.000+08:00

rain rain go away!
rain always seems to be getting in my way whenever i want to go do something or go somewhere. i've been drenched enough and have waited at enough busstops and flyovers this month for the rain to stop. yeah yeah, i know i should go get a box for yakkul so that i can store a set of rainclothes. unfortunately a box on a scrambler isn't aesthetically pleasing.

There were no lies between me and you. You said nothing of what you knew. But there was still something in your eyes. Left me helpless and paralysed

2005-04-09T03:23:00.000+08:00

Chicane - no ordinary morning

If there was nothing that I could say
Turned your back and you just walked away
Leaves me numb inside I think of you
Together is all I knew

We moved too fast but I had no signs
I would try to turn the hands of time
I look to you for a reason why
The love we had passed me by

And as the sun would set, you would rise
Fall from the sky into paradise
Is there no light in your heart for me
You've closed your eyes, you no longer see

There were no lies between me and you
You said nothing of what you knew
But there was still something in your eyes
Left me helpless and paralysed

You could give a million reasons change the world and change the tides
Could not give me the secrets of your heart and of your mind
In the darkness that surrounds me now there is no peace of mind
Your careless words undo me, leave the thought of us behind
You could give a million reasons change the world and change the time
Could not give me the secrets of your heart and of your mind
In the darkness that surrounds you know there is no peace of mind
Your careless words undo me, leave the thought of us behind

there'll be lesser screams of "Cooookieee!" from cookie monster it seems

2005-04-08T22:28:00.000+08:00

Cookie Monster Advocating Eating Healthy

cookie monster eating healthy? what's cookie monster if he's not only having only cookies for substenance? 'sometimes cookie monster'?

what's this? they should have left the furry blue cookie muncher alone. they should just get to issues that should be resolved like having bert and ernie coming out of the closet.

hantu dive 030405

2005-04-07T13:10:00.000+08:00

went for a leisure dive at hantu last sunday. this be em pix

Glossodoris Atromarginata

i'm quite happy with this shot. this is the first one i got off with this nudibranch so i managed to get it with the gills out before it noticed me. check out the marilyn monroe beauty spot on it's right

another one i caught. check out the skirting! it looks like some flamboyant cravat on a gay tango dancer's shirt.

Phyllidia Ocellata(Phyllidiidae)

pure wierdness. no you're not tripping on acid. this is really how nature created them

polyclad flatworm thysanozoon sp

cushion star. big enough to sit on. literally

enough of nudibranchs, flatworms and echinoderms.
let's have some fish.

boxfish

think tissue box with fins. that's the approximate size and look.

yellowtail barracuda

i spent nearly half a dive playing tag with these guys. they swim damn fast!
i'll chase em and lose them for a couple of seconds and they're back again darting from another direction. it was fun. next dive i'll try to keep up. :P

butterfly lovers

people usually don't notice copper banded butterfly fish because they're like the common gentry of the reef. this pair caught my attention because they were quite huge(palm sized) and just continued slowly grazing over the coral even when i finned over and started stalking them. they were quite sweet. hanging out quite closely with each other.

my indie cred penis is bigger than yours

2005-04-06T13:05:00.000+08:00

indie cred comparison= penis size comparison
this cracked me up. really reminded me of some people i know.

tsk tsk. if it's good music, it really doesn't matter when you started listening to it. as a matter of fact, i actually got a couple of mew tracks a few months back but didn't really listen to them. only recently, after spending time on them, i got into their album 'frengers' after falling in love with 'am i wry? no' then 'snow brigade' and 'she spider'. and it came out in 2003. i wished i've heard this album earlier. minor consolation is that i got it from hmv at $7.95. :D

but, if you've dissed the music earlier when said music is introduced to you and suddenly am into it a big way now because it's the 'in' or popular thing now, you're worse than those indie cred penile comparators. shame on you.

it's that time of the month again and i don't mean cramps

2005-04-04T20:10:00.000+08:00

2 shots of happy, 1 shot of mad.
nothing more needs to be said.

this wednesday would have disco biscuit and force vormit ala acoustic over at hideout. radzi will also be at the decks letting loose em indie tunes. i foresee another crazy night of bras and panties being flung around/worn on head, dancing with umbrellas, alcohol flowing like water and stones roses songs sung with only tambla accompliment. the lunacy should start around 9.30

not a good idea to drive or ride that night if you're going down and mungen. it's been scientifically proven that mungens get drunk on alcoholic mouthwash. unless you happen to reside at mount newton and drink tsingtao everyday that is. speaking of which, the said duke of mount newton just texted me to join him...

miaow

2005-04-01T19:07:00.000+08:00

my income tax isn't done yet, i got 2 assignments due soon ,haven't even touched my graduation project and all i can think about now is wanting a cat. most people swear by dogs but i'll much prefer cats thank you(not that i hate dogs, i just like em on a lesser scale). cats ration out their affections unlike dogs who give you their eternal fealty. so you'll have to earn their love. sure sounds like getting a cat is similar to getting into a relationship with the fairer sex.

have been reading this webcomic recently and i enjoyed it lots.

lots of music references and quirky lines.
hope you guys enjoy it too.

now i'm waiting to get off work, go dump my bike at home and rush down to Prince of Wales to meet up with KL friend and knock back a pint or two. hope there's a band or two playing. was at the pow webbie and there's no information about the bands playing in april.

enjoy the weekend.

tak giu

2005-03-26T01:35:00.000+08:00

tak giu

a short film abt 3 guys trying to find a place just to kick a ball ard in sg.
something most sg kids can identify with i believe.

do you realise?

2005-03-25T23:57:00.000+08:00

flaming lips

Do you realise?

Do you realise
That you have the most beautiful face?
Do you realise
We're floating in space?
Do you realise
That happiness makes you cry?

Do you realise
That everyone you know someday will die?
And instead of saying all of your good-byes
Let them know you realise that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realise the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do you realise?

Do you realise
That everyone you know someday will die?
And instead of saying all of your good-byes
Let them know you realise that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realise the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do you realise
That you have the most beautiful face?

Do you realise?

hantu bloggers 1 year anniversary dive (otherwise known as my best dive ever)

2005-03-22T04:41:00.000+08:00

we visited hantu's underwater garden that nice bright sunday morning.
vis was great at roughly 5m.

what's an underwater garden without a pretty slug or two?

this batfish was hanging out in a discarded bubu.
don't worry, there's an opening big enough for it to get out.

swimmer crab. en garde! there were loads of them.
you just have to look under a outcropping or a crevice
and you were almost guaranteed to spot one. one group spotted
a seahorse(missed it cos of equalisation problems)
and a school of juvenile barracudas. debs took a
picture of some ugly thing that may be a stargazer. well if it isn't,
they sure bought their looks at the same department.(edit: it's a
toadfish)

after two dives, we took advantage of the low tide and
checked out the creatures that inhabited the island.
A monitor lizard was spotted! unfortunately batteries died
it ran pretty quick.

hantu lagoon crossing

egret with a kingfisher in background

no fiddlers were harmed in the process.
that's sam's little finger by the way.

a purple fiddler crab. sam and i realised that one way to make
these tiny high octane scurrying creatures to stop is to give them shade.
one of em critters was running around and only stopped when
it approached the shade of sam's sandal. when sam moved his foot, it
scurried over to his sandal and stopped again.

jeff, debs and sam checking out the legend of pulau hantu.

after the trip to the island we went back to our boat, geared up
and went down for our 3rd day dive.

icon star. i'm beginning to suspect that i keep bumping into
same one at each hantu dive.

and finally what we're all looking forward to. the night dive!
it was great! hantu sure got all it's wares out on display like a
night pasar malam! we spotted a huge cuttlefish,
a winged pipefish(looked like an albino bloodworm to me, with it's squiggling
and squirming among the coral), and
what made this my best dive ever so far!

the story of the morose cuttlefish

and now i present to you...

an adult hawksbill turtle! it was huge!!!!
ah, heck! even if you minus the 25% magnification underwater, it's still huge!
and it's definitely older than me! it has probably withdrawn it's cpf savings already!
debs shone her torch into my mask and i finned over. puzzled and a little put
off cos she blinded me, i was wondering if it was an emergency. she then shone
her torch on this smooth rock with barnacles on it and i was thinking that it may
be some small critter. it was only when she shone the torch on the head,
then it hit me. bouyancy control went out of the window while i was fumbling
with my camera to snap a picture. it was so close to us!it pivoted and then
swam past us as gracefully as an imperial star destroyer(sam's words. quite an
apt description). we were whooping like mad people when we surfaced.
pulau hantu really gave us a great present for this one year anniversary dive.

the divers listening to the dive brief by debs. i'm really glad this dive
happened. now forgive me while i go back to daydreaming that i'll see
that big momma dame of a turtle again at my next hantu dive. :D

rndm gig/poptart 19mar05

2005-03-20T05:07:00.000+08:00

went late for it cos i had to pack for dive on sunday.
only caught analog girl and a bit of fishtank cos you can't smoke in mox and was busy outside puffing my lungs out most of the time. i'm not bitching about the non-smoking in there cos it's not really airy there and if you smoked, half the people there would probably pass out from lack of oxygen.

the music at poptart is ace as usual but mox was a sauna and most of the time was spent in front of a fan trying to cool down. oh and the drinks were sucky. 5 watery screwdrivers and a beer did nothing for me. i wasn't planning on getting drunk but if i'm spending that much on drinks, i deserve at least a buzz damnit! bleah.

no pix this time cos camera was being prepped for hantu dive.
next time kids. maybe i'll steal a couple of shots from friends.

WRs

2005-03-15T01:21:00.000+08:00

bikes
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

my brother has made his sale for his bike so yakkul(the one behind) is going to be the only WR in the carpark now. no more same species bike to hang around with. my brother's upgrading to a chauffeur driven mercedes/volvo. ah well...

bikes2
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

hantu dive 12mar05

2005-03-13T15:01:00.000+08:00

went for a dive with big paul(his way better photos here) and his fellow hardkore dive photographers. i want macro lenses! bleah.

the first dive was great! we did west of hantu and vis was absolutely great! the coral growth there is great! i can't believe that there was so much coral there! the marine life was all out! camera died on me though. so i have nothing to show for it.

2nd dive near jetty was not such a good experience though. vis was totally down to 1.5m and it was dark as the sun decided to hide. wished i had a dive torch then. maybe cos the first dive was so great and all my previous dives near the jetty were always great. i did get to fool around with a school of fusiliers though.

ah well. i'll be back next week with a vengeance, hantu! *shakes fist in air*

clear waters at west hantu! if you look closely you can see coral under the waters!

whip goby.
after many hydroid stings, this is all i got to show( it's sucky i know). taking macro underwater is tough especially if you don't have a powerful camera, appropriate lenses and the whip coral(sub-subject) keeps moving in the current.

cuttlefish. the only shot i got off on first dive before camera decided to die. i saw it buried in the sand with its camo turned 'on'. it was only after i tried to get the attention of other divers that it noticed me, turned white and jetted away. i took this while it was making it's escape.

i'll be back hantu! this won't be the last you'll hear from me! :P

hp pblogging (centrepoint kids)

2005-03-11T06:53:00.000+08:00

at around 1am on wednesday night,on the way to our bikes after plonking tim in a cab, debs spied a ladder leading to the roof above the walkway at centrepoint and reckoned if we should climb it. we did, bike helmets in one hand and all. it was a buggery steep ladder and here's the proof!

the top is carpeted and full of dead leaves
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

debs pretending she had just scaled a mountain
and reveling in her achievement
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

phoenix hotel
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

"someone removing the ladder while we're up there" thoughts are freeeky
Originally uploaded by StillLost.

misread

2005-03-08T21:27:00.000+08:00

How come no-one told me
All throughout history
The loneliest people
Were the ones who always spoke the truth
The ones who made a difference
By withstanding the indifference
I guess it's up to me now
Should I take that risk or just smile?

kings of convenience
misread

job is depressing. thank god for the stone roses.
and i thank god everyday that i'm not indifferent to crap being loaded onto me.
a newton buddy once told me to go out and do what i want. cos if i don't, then when i'm older, i'm gonna wonder what it would have been like IF i had done something about it and succeeded.

be it failure or sucess, at least i daresay i am doing something about current horrible situation and have no regrets.
oh, and i get to flip the finger at current job too.

poptart 05mar05

2005-03-08T10:20:00.000+08:00

am too lazy to post rest of poptart pix. but this picture ought to basically sum up that session was like.
maybe i'll post the rest of em when i'm up to it.
damnit can't hello just allow us to post multiple pictures in one post?
and if anyone knows a solution please let me know( the tedious editing of multiple posts doesn't count)

You're just killin' fun

2005-03-03T23:18:00.000+08:00

The Thrills - Don't steal our sun

So you've paid your dues,
(No intention to)
Those Elvis frauds, how they'll applaud,
Farewell my friends

So in your rock'n'roll
(In your rock'n'roll)
And pretty soon those pretty girls
Will find your home

We'll pay you handsomely (But you see)
Dont steal our sun
Dont steal our sun(You're just killin' fun)

I said you felt so good
(I said you felt so good)
Well I'm amazed
hey what a show

i heard you're dating Sue (yeah your welcome to)
I'd love to talk
but don't we know
That don't ring true

We'll pay you handsomely (But you see)
Dont steal our sun
Dont steal our sun(You're just killin' fun)

i need a beach holiday soon. bright sunshine, the beach, crystal blue waters.
and no more of singapore's shitty humidity.

thank god tomorrow's friday.
let the partying begin tomorrow night.
yet again we have nuance playing at pow.
it's at 10 by the way.
it'll be the last time for a while cos donald is flying back to melbourne on saturday. so do come down and check em out.
jon would also be spinning at hideout with a pal of his from 9pm onwards till 3.
i'm looking forward to hearing sam hui. :D
come down ya?
don't steal our sun(you're just killin' fun)
dooo-wahhhh-ooooo!

what mills and boons covers should really look like.

2005-03-02T04:49:00.000+08:00

re-imagined romance covers
read it at mr brown and thought i'll share the love.

isn't anything sacred anymore?

2005-02-24T10:07:00.000+08:00

my childhood has been defiled

poptart gallery up!

2005-02-23T23:59:00.000+08:00

the poptart picture gallery is up! be sweet dears and go here.
details on next one

can't wait! for those who haven't been there before, do come.
i believe the pictures will show you guys what you've been missing out.

19Feb05 told thru snaps

2005-02-22T08:52:00.000+08:00

Music For Good's Operation Restoration gig

concave scream

pan

sean

Nuance at POW

ingredients towards making a poptart at phuture 19 Feb 05

one popslut

one of the 4 evil masterminds. mix all 4 well into the batter

the alcoholman to make sure noone's sober

one crazy shiny happy crowd to pack the place

5 measurements of friends (the more, the better the result). bring to boil over indiemusic.

serve garnished with happy merry drunk bday boy(glazed eyes optional)

and the everpresent robot man.
the end product will result with us wanting more. we're such dj bullies. enjoy!

F.U.C.K Y.O.U in morse

2005-02-19T09:23:00.000+08:00

the lorry just turned out suddenly without signalling and just carried on turning nonchantlently even though i've hi-beamed him and moved to the outside of the lane.
i narrowly avoided him.
i turned around and glared at him when he stopped behind me. i'll settle for learning how to tap out FUCK YOU with my brake lights although what i really would like to do is tap out " You motherfucking nipple-less piles inflicted encrusted piece of toejam whore. You ought to have you license revoked and sent to driving school hell where every moment of the rest of your life is spent stuck in a chair watching videos on how irresponsible people like you cause accidents( no smoking breaks or toilet breaks at all and ala clockwork orange). Oh, and may your balls be stuck in a wedgie for the rest of your life without being able to correct it."

happy thoughts happy thoughts.
it's gonna be a good saturday.
it's just a bad start in the morning.

saturdays have never been finer

2005-02-18T19:48:00.000+08:00

concert for Operation Restoration
All proceeds will go to Operation Restoration: Sri Lanka - a project under the YMCA Disaster Relief Programme for Sri Lanka disaster victims affected by the tragedy of the killer waves and the worst earthquake in the world in 40 years.

Bands playing:
Observatory
Ugly in the Morning
Concave Scream(woohoo!)
Typewriter
Ronin
Pugjelly
Astreal

Venue: YMCA auditorium (1 Orchard Road)
Date: Saturday February 19, 2005
Time: 5:00pm - 9.00pm
Entry by donation of $10 or more at the door.

Nuance will be playing at POW at 10 onwards.
their music has been well received last week. so, here they are again!
and after that...

popsluts of the world. unite to take over!

Foie Gras = yummy

2005-02-17T18:42:00.000+08:00

To those who love foie gras, why won't you check out how it's prepared?
foie gras = yummy
more info here

This PR campaign r0x0r5 j00 b0x0r5!

2005-02-17T18:27:00.000+08:00

i seriously didn't know what to say when i saw this PR campaign.
go check out the clip and comic.
Making every penis a healthy penis!

this is the kind of crap that happens when you're bored and jaded at work.

2005-02-16T23:49:00.000+08:00

soma-doused daydreams
to numb plebeians to the yoke
of meaningless toil

nuance 11 feb 05

2005-02-13T15:04:00.000+08:00

nuance's first gig at prince of wales on the 11th.
they got a very warm reception. music was great. and donald can't tell jokes on stage to save his life. as per norm, pints flowed freely and donald beat me at pool(note to self, do not consume too much alcohol if you plan to play pool). i'll get ya next time.

mel would be leaving for melbourne today. the next time we'll prolly see her again would be near the end of next year. :(

bye mel. we'll miss ya.

superman is a dick

2005-02-11T19:01:00.000+08:00

superman is a dick
enuff said.

05 feb poptart madness

2005-02-09T21:43:00.000+08:00

pic from poptart 05 feb. it was on till 6am.
i haven't partied so hard in such a long time.
if you weren't there, this is what you've missed out on.

pulau hantu, starfishes, loads of nudis and coral = bliss

2005-02-09T18:31:00.000+08:00

went for a hantu bloggers dive on 5th of feb. it was an excellent dive! vis was actually really good and the reef was teeming with nudis and butterfly fish(they were too fast for me to snap). below are a couple of pix i took. enjoy. better pix can be found at the hantu bloggers website so do drop by.

isn't this starfish pretty?

this is the biggest mother of a flatworm i've ever seen! it's 1 & 1/2 palm size! wonder what it's been feeding on...

pretty coral at hantu

waning cresent

2005-02-04T23:59:00.000+08:00

i wish i had a stand then.

lights

2005-02-04T23:57:00.000+08:00

poptart feb sessions are..CLOSER than you expect em to be!

2005-01-31T03:03:00.000+08:00

my info was wrong guys.... hold on to em lungs and livers cos there's gonna be another poptart session next saturday. which would make it an absolutely smashing weekend for me. exams over by then. go for a dive in the morning, get back to mainland, freshen up and go for the mocca gig and then it's off to poptart! i fear for my liver but i believe it understands. above pix courtesy of nats.

Serenaide

2005-01-30T15:49:00.000+08:00

Serenaide

i know i'm slow at posting pictures. :P
this was from Serenaide's gig of 22 january.
Pheyroz in the archie outfit and Nat in her tutu behind.

and anyone who has a love for indie music has to be at the poptart sessions.
all i can say about last night was that it's mind blowing. at least the next one ain't too far off(i think it's mid feb phuture). not like the one before in december, i had to wait a whole month for last night! the song that blew me away last night was suede's 'europe is our playground'. copious amounts of alcohol, drunk friend hitting on poptartlets, jumping around on the dance floor to favourite tunes, sigh. why did it have to end?

will post pix once i steal em from cam toting friends. ;)

2005-01-20T11:56:00.000+08:00

hi.

it's been a while.
last weekend was quite a blast. gigs back to back. no pictures cos i wanted to enjoy the gigs. :P

friday was astreal at rouge. they've been keeping too low a profile these past few months and it's good to hear their noise again. it was very enjoyable except that it was held together with a uni bash and i hear 'un ones making comments like "dunno why they must have this band with stupid music on, can only dance after 12 now".

tsk tsk, no need to make such judgements kids. not happy just toodle off. we understand your tastes in music run along the lines of ashlee simpson. astreal just doesn't cut it like her do they? i don't think we can hear ginnette continue singing even if the mike died. i'm sorry if the rest of us who stayed to catch Astreal got in the way of your record giant churned out 5 minute lifespan pop music and manufactured pop clones.

saturday was george chua together with aspidistra fly at guiness theatre. i was very distracted by george's visual backdrop because it consists of marine life pictures. i was screaming "bubble coral! brittle star! staghorn coral! goosehead barnacle! nudi!" in my head. aspidistra fly was good except that it was marred by moments when the guitarist strummed his guitar to check if it's in tune, breaking the spell of darkness and her voice.

sunday....sunday bhess!
serenaide blew me away! it was their album launch at prince of wales. i have heard their songs before but this gig was good cos pheyroz was very cheeky and couldn't stop talking. the pub was packed to it's gills. there was a very good gig vibe in the air. cheap beer was also a contributing factor to the cheery mood.

tonight.. would be the localized event at zouk.
observatory would be playing at 10.30 so come on down if you can.

last post of the year

2004-12-31T02:01:00.000+08:00

failed recollections of a fool

this year has been really turbulent for me.
lots of downs, a few ups.

the downs, let's see
ties that have been tying me down are finally, totally severed(it was really painful but it must be done or i'll never go anywhere).
i've stilled my heart and made myself face the facts that i should give up as eventually the situation would never turn out favorably. i'll lose things i currently possess and treasure now if i didn't(it means a hell lot to me and i don't wanna lose it).
i've woken up and sorta grasped a little of what this whole ballgame called life is all about. i've taken to treading carefully now and am only investing effort in things i deem worthwhile. let's just say once bitten, twice shy shall we?
oh to be naive and easily contented again. hmmm do i? looks like a matrix red/blue pill situation here.
and of cos, the thrice mu***af**king damned accidents. f**king miss riding yakkul lots.
while we're at the downs, anyone who has a heart, please contribute in any way you can to the tsunami victims. they really need our help.

ah well, on the upside.
i've spread my wings a little and got myself a bike license and a bike that i love to ride.i love the feeling of the wind in my face and how yakkul responds accordingly to my every subtle touch.
i've taken up diving and dive whenever time and budget permits. i am totally enamoured by the underwater world. it's just so lovely. it's hard to put in words the beauty and the serenity one experiences underwater. a soothing balm for this mad world that we live in.
pursuing my dream and studying what i want despite going against the grain of what society expects me to do. at least if i fail in it later in life, i can daresay i have at least tried and not live in doubt my whole life, wondering if i would have been happier if i had made the choice.
new true friends are always a joy. i'm really glad to have made a friend in natalie. she's so totally one of us(where have you been all this while? the north pole?). you're a great addition to the fellowship of the lim, sister.
and lastly, the love and fellowship of those who really care for and matter to me(near and far). not gonna name people. i believe you few people oughta know who you are. i would never have made it through the year mostly sane without you guys.

Those who feel the breath of sadness
Sit down next to me
Those who find they're touched by madness
Sit down next to me
Those who find themselves ridiculous
Sit down next to me
Love, in fear, in hate, in tears
Love, in fear, in hate, in tears
Love, in fear, in hate, in tears
Love, in fear, in hate

Down
Down

James
Sit Down

let's close the final chapter of the year for this blog then.
happy new year.
au lang syne and all that jazz.
to fresh beginnings and better endings.

was that a great night or what?

2004-12-22T13:13:00.000+08:00

poptart's indie night at mad monk's on the 18th of Dec was crazy fun. loads of good tunes, huge loads of drinking, excessive loads of crazed dancing and screaming along to the songs we love.
pix of that baachian night can be found here. as you can tell from the last pix, many new friends were made that night due to the influence of alcohol and similar tastes in music.
the next one would be on jan 22nd. i'll definitely be there.

yakkul

2004-12-12T17:50:00.000+08:00

so much stuff has happened in recently. the most major of all is me being involved in an accident last thursday. i got my right hand fractured, a metal plate inserted, and am basically quite handicapped(i eat sashimi with a fork and take around ten minutes to tie my laces). i have no idea what is the state of yakkul right now as he's impounded by the TP.

the computer died recently and by pure luck it's up and going again(sound card is dead though). so the past few days had been hell. at home with no computer, no mp3s, no internet, no half life 2( i got around the fractured hand/mouse problem by using a joystick),no anime. yeah i know, watch dvds and read. but there's only so much of that i can do.

ah well, at least with the comp up i can surf now. :)

mirrormask

2004-12-01T13:41:00.000+08:00

mirrormask pix
over here. go check it out. it's something you can't miss especially if you're a big dave mckean fan. the pictures are gorgeous.