there's gotta be more to life than chasing down every temporary high to satisfy me

yeah yeah it's a stacie orrico pop song.

"Choose life. Choose a job. Choose a career. Choose a family. Choose a fucking big television. Choose washing machines, cars, compact disc players and electrical tin openers..... Choose DIY and wondering who the fuck you are on a Sunday morning. Choose sitting on that couch watching mind numbing, spirit crushing game shows, stuffing junk food into your mouth. Choose rotting away at the end of it all, pissing your last in a miserable home, nothing more than an embarrassment to the selfish, fucked-up brats you spawned to replace yourself. Choose your future. Choose life..... But why would I want to do a thing like that?"

Renton - Trainspotting

it's depressing when you rely on temporary highs to be happy.
hmm contradictory statement.
was supposed to detox before bali yet i've ended up drinking way too much this week.
is it better to have never known true happiness and just get by?
or to have gotten a glimpse of it and then attempt to pursue it?

someone once mentioned i'll be happier leading this kinda of hard drinking, partying life.
maybe, i could have pulled it off before. but not now.

drinking just doesn't do much for me these days.
unfortunately it's the most common activity that occurs at night with people and i'll jump at any opportunity to get out of the house. i don't wanna rot at home and think too much.

heck, can't wait for bali. and that ain't some temporary high.
it's a place i've always wanted to go and details are more or less settled.
just some last minute nitty gritty stuff that i'll deal with before i leave.

now excuse me while i go nap off this jurong island sized hangover.